These are just some of the times that my friends have said some rather funny things about my Type 1 Diabetes/EoE
For starters, one night I was talking with my friend, around 7 pm, and my pump vibrated…
“Does that mean you’re going to explode?”
Another time, I was in math class, same friend as before, and my pump went off. It was silent in the classroom aside from my Tandem vibrating against the plastic seat, and my friend yelling,
“ELLIE ARE YOU DYING?”
No, I’m not.
Ah yes, then one from the person who had no clue about my condition, and saw me pull out my pump.
“IS THAT A VAPE??? TEACHER-”
I got that one sorted out, as I always do.
My friends (and not friends) have all said some rather funny things about my pump, Dexcom, and other things. I’ve also said some funny things too.
“Hey Ellie, what’t that?” They point to my arm.
“Miniature bomb.” That one had my science teacher laughing.
Some other responses include,
“Government tracking device.”
“Personal Hot Spot generator.”
“Your mother.”
“I can’t tell you or it will destroy the space-time continuum, therefore defeating my purpose of coming here.”
“The result of a grueling fight to the death.”
“Car key that was embedded into my arm.”
“Just something that you will know about in due time.”
“I can’t tell you now, your feeble brain capacity cannot handle it.” ~That one got me in a little bit of trouble~
“A device that keeps the Terminators away.”
“This enhances the speeds of my activities such as typing, writing, walking, and pretty much everything.” (I think and talk really fast on a normal occasion, along with most of my normal activities.)
“Travel-sized C4 bomb, just in case.”
IF YOU’RE GOING TO USE SOME OF THESE, BE SURE THAT NO ADULT IS AROUND FOR A FEW OF THEM (the bomb!)
Another time, I was talking with the same friend who thought I was going to explode, and I told them about my EoE.
“You can’t have dairy? But that’s in, like, everything. The grilled cheese sandwich I made alone has enough butter to kill an elephant. HOW DO YOU SURVIVE?”
I got to explain to them my medicines and how they allow me to have dairy, along with the fact that there are things in this world that do not contain diary.
Ah yes, middle school conversations. So much fun.
